"I GOT LIFE" - A FILM ABOUT WAR MENTALITY AND STRESS

Still from "I Got Life", copyright by Vivi-Mari Carpelan 2014

This was another fiddly project to finish, lots of technical issues that stretched this project over a period of a couple of months rather than weeks. I have vowed never to make anything similar again with somewhat unsophisticated software! I wanted to create something ironic around the song "I Got Life" from the musical "Hair" (1967) and then decided to combine it with my latest sound piece, "A Long Way to Heaven", mostly based on machine sounds that represent the mechanised, industrialised aspects of our lives that we have clearly not yet come to terms with. At the time, I was losing a lot of hair and ended up cutting it all off. Hair is, of course, a strong symbol of individuality, confidence and strength. I also didn't feel I had much life to speak of, as my condition and the insomnia was getting the better of me.

I decided to make an emotional film about the modern age conundrum of surviving inhuman amounts of stress. I used some footage of my own to express feelings of stress in our modern lives, yet mostly looked back to old footage of WWI and WWII, for an authentic document of war related stress. Since I have no way of using modern war footage, this was a self-evident choice that also fits in with the 2014 commemoration of the Great War. There is an obvious correlation between day-to-day stress in modern times and war related stress. Stress affects most of us in one way or another.

Stills from "I Got Life" copyright Vivi-Mari Carpelan 2014

Warfare defines our life on Earth. The war mongering mentality that gives rise to this regrettable fact pervades all of society and poisons every aspect of the human life experience. There is nowhere to escape from the feeling of being targeted, chased, threatened and hunted down. The unconscious stress reactions that follow aren’t confined to the battle field or the besieged city, but arise everywhere and anywhere throughout our lives. The majority of illnesses are generated by stress, and over time, they are increasingly likely to become chronic. It isn’t just our immediate physical survival that is at stake, it’s also the body’s ability to sustain life in the long term. The mental and emotional repercussions are disastrous and the survival of the authentic self is eventually also at stake. Severe disability will no doubt soon become the norm within the framework of society as we know it today.

In the film “I Got Life”, war is presented as a fact as well as a metaphor for a stressful life that has undertones of constant warfare. Life has become a traumatic struggle to manage the invisible forces that manipulate our bodies and mind, and the joy of being alive is gone. Moreover, when humans do break down from the effects of chronic stress, society is quick to jump on more guns to finish off the ones they consider weak and useless. The irony is that it’s often the shallow and dull individuals who are able to withstand stress the best. Are these the people who should lead our world?

“I Got Life” is based on old footage from the World War I and World War II, as well as footage of myself as the civilian narrator. The circular shape is indicative of the feeling of being targeted. The black and white, as well as negative effect, underline the timelessness and starkness of the affects. The film has been constructed around a sound collage I made called “A Long Way to Heaven”. It features machine sounds, radio sounds from the Cold War and other war related sounds. I performed the song “I Got Life” from the musical “Hair” from 1967 and added it to the track. It was sung on a day I felt quite tired in the same tempo as the song in the 1979 film version. As it is fast and quite a tongue twister, it makes the performance sound shallow and panicky. At the time, the musical was a radical criticism of religion and warfare that met with a lot of resistance until entering pop culture for good. By using this highly energised song about the good things in life in the context of stress and war I was hoping to further reinforce the sense of irony and how difficult it is for severely exhausted and ill people to feel that joy of having a body and being alive. Yet this should surely be everyone’s birthright?

MORE EXPERIMENTAL MUSIC FOR "MUSIC FOR LIMINAL TIMES"

Quality downloads of my music from Bandcamp

Having branched out, I now realise how each medium lends itself to quite specific ways of expression, and they truly are not interchangeable. I decided to continue experimenting with found sounds and the subject matter that came to me was times of change and transition. It has been quite fascinating to see how feel different about this medium - I feel that I can express psychological realities in a way that I can't quite do with other media. Sound has always been quite an emotional affair to me and I have been curious about alternative music all my adult life, so it comes as no surprise that I seem to be more emotionally expressive this way. Perhaps that's just my personal impression based on novelty value, however it has still been quite satisfying to me. 

I have realised that I really want to champion a greater attention to emotional intelligence, as I feel it has gotten somewhat lost in this mechanical age. It is easy to forget just how multidimensional we are when we go about our day in a typically mindless way. I know many people find this kind of music very difficult and maybe even pointless, but it does require some attention and mindfulness. It's not supposed to be easy, yet I would hope that when given the appropriate attention it would trigger some sense of recognition and connection with the psyche. It's not meant to be "just entertainment", nor is it meant to be so difficult no one can stand listening to it. Why this music is at the intersection of music and sound art is in my opinion because it has a specific concept and attempts to express ideas in a reasonably complex way. One can argue this line but it's fairly clear to me. This music requires reflection, not just mindless consumption. My mom was quite taken by it, and said it sounded just like me, and that it gave her imagery that she remembers from my visual artwork since time immemorial. This musical pursuit really reflects my life long interest in the deeper layers of our psyche - in fact one of the strands of comparative religion that I was focusing on at University was the psychology of religion. It's all making sense to me now...

I have created two new pieces and decided to pursue this project until I have a complete album. I call this endeavour "Music for Liminal Times". The word liminal is to me an intriguing and beautiful word. I realise not everyone has come across it but hey, then it's about time, eh? Liminal is originally an anthropological term that denotes times of transition and change. It's a time that is out of the ordinary. It can be a rite of passage, it can be times of war, it can be crazy carnival time, it can be times of relocation, or times of inner change. These times are archetypal thresholds, usually marked by disorder and chaos until a new order ensues. All of these situations are interesting from a psychological point of view because they help us evolve, on a personal level as well as on the level of collective consciousness. I find that I am really quite fascinated with the way collective consciousness interacts with the individual consciousness, often in a compelling and quite distressing way. To withstand this influence and retain personal integrity is difficult. However, I believe that awareness of this and how we transit from one stage or level to another is quite important to a more fluid experience of life.

In anthropology, liminality (from the Latin word līmen, meaning "a threshold", is the quality of ambiguity or disorientation that occurs in the middle stage of rituals, when participants no longer hold their pre-ritual status but have not yet begun the transition to the status they will hold when the ritual is complete. During a ritual's liminal stage, participants "stand at the threshold" between their previous way of structuring their identity, time, or community, and a new way, which the ritual establishes. /.../ The dissolution of order during liminality creates a fluid, malleable situation that enables new institutions and customs to become established. (From Wikipedia)

The two new pieces are...

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The theme for the first one was suggested by old recordings done on an Edison Sound Cylinder back in 1904. The music sounded quite odd and was fun to work with. The quality of the singing was so terrible at times that it made me think of how desperate people enter singing competitions in order to be famous. Fame is another very futile and transient experience that is surely quite nice while it lasts, but as we all know is also of very relative value and a very exclusive one at that. It has little to do with real (ordinary) life, yet even I secretly dream of it..!

The theme for the other piece was one I already had in mind while I was looking for material, as I mean to make a film with my abstract photography ("Traces"). I have already discussed the possibility of showing this film during a themed exhibition at a nearby gallery ("Maesmawr") next year - the owner is planning to show several films on the theme "Journey".  Being in transit - transitioning from a to b - is of course a liminal experience. This time, I was inspired by my own efforts to meditate and thus try and rebalance my self. As most people know, when you do you become mindful of many inner events and psychological issues, and that's what this piece is mainly about. I did find it difficult to make it long enough, without it becoming cliched and boring meditation music. It took me quite a while to figure out how to create harmonious depth to the latter part. 

I hope it's not too hard to detect my sense of irony and subtle humour in these pieces. After all, if we take life too seriously we will only become depressed and even suicidal. 

The first piece took me only two days to create, but after that I had a lot of flawed waveforms to fix (that's a whole new ball game, phew!). The preparations for the second piece took a couple of days (that is, collecting the sounds of the public domain as my rule of thumb is that it must be free, as difficult as it is to find such sounds), then the actual creation took about three - four days. It means I now have more method and experience than when I did the first pieces, but I'm working with very basic and quite cumbersome free software (Audacity). 

The making of this music is a process of complete deconstruction and reconstruction, during which I reimagine classical music of the past - one may in fact question whether classical music exists at all today. To this mix, I various other elements of my own liking.

You might like to see how Max Richter has reimagined Vivaldi, and also a project in which he refers to the past through the spoken word, Memory House.